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If you are like me, you like things done in a certain way. Sometimes I get irritated when others, who don’t know that, do something I don’t like. Over the years, I have found that a frank conversation at the beginning of a working relationship can really help prevent these issues.
The outcome of that conversation is a "user manual", which can act as a reference and be updated as needed. Within a team, these user manuals can help build trust and understanding and prevent petty tensions from becoming full blown disputes.
To help you get your first draft going, think deeply and answer the 12 questions below:
- What are your goals? Think about your job goals and, if you are comfortable, some personal ones.
- What impact do you hope to make? This might be an impact on the team you work with, the business overall or anything else you feel like sharing.
- What honest, unfiltered things should your co-workers know about you? For example, are you a morning person, an introvert, someone who needs time to contemplate before making a decision, data-driven, ask a lot of questions to get information, not particularly social, etc.
- How do you expect others with whom you work to behave? For example, come to meetings prepared; stay off devices while in meetings; if my door is closed, come back later when it's open; keep your promises; tell me about problems early.
- What results or level of performance do you expect from others? Examples include: If you make a promise, keep it. If there’s an issue that will prevent you from keeping a promise, let’s talk. Don’t surprise me, keep me apprised.
- How do you prefer to communicate? I prefer email or a phone call over text or IM. If there is a meeting, I expect an agenda and a good reason for me to attend. I don’t like monologue-type presentations; keep the dialogue open. I learn by asking questions.
- What are your expectations regarding response times? Unless requested otherwise, you can expect me to respond within the business day. If something requires an urgent response, call me.
- What are your feelings about communication and response times after-hours? I try to respect business hours, but I do tend to work outside those hours myself. If you get a message from me outside business hours, I do not expect a reply unless it is urgent or there is a crisis.
- Do you prefer to work from home or in the office? Zoom versus in-person meetings? I like to work at home or in a quiet space in an office. I prefer in-person to Zoom but recognize that isn’t always possible.
- If I want you to try something new or do something differently, how should I approach you? Best bet with me is to tell me you want to experiment. Let's have a discussion about it and determine the parameters of the experiment.
- If you are under stress, what might be the signs that tell me? How would you like me to react/help? For example, I will be eating candy, drinking excessive amounts of coffee or pop. I will be short tempered. If you notice that, ask me, "what’s up?"
- What is your preferred method to be recognized? I am happy with compliments that come from genuine place. I do not like big public displays.
Treat your manual as a living/evolving document. Get your teammates to do the same. Keep the conversation going by checking in on the manuals once in a while but at least annually or after significant milestones.
